America’s Next Top Model

 

This Is Reality Baby

In this economy it is not enough to just have a beautiful face and figure. You have to be able to multitask…..for instance, Miss Piggy has been forced into plowing the back forty in order to feed the less endowed creatures that happen to dwell here. She  has had numerous requests for her modeling skills, but until the money comes rolling in, she is  happy to supplement our income with this manual labor. She also cooks and cleans, but I guarantee that her calendar will bring in enough funds to feed this overwhelming household  throughout  the next drought…..

Mr. Piggy

Miss Piggy always wanted a friend, even a bucket or ball or any object that was her shape would hold her interest until it sadly rolled away. I’m sure she has forgotten that she is a pig. I was just making her yummy pancakes this morning when Eddie, one of Peyton’s best friends called. “It’s Eddie” Peyton said. “He wants to bring bacon over. They are on their way” How sweet, I thought, but why would he be bringing us breakfast. ” Remember, Mom, “Bacon” the pig that he asked you to keep “for a few days” until they can build a pen?” Oh, right. I went to feed Miss Piggy, there was nothing I could say to prepare her for this, but I needed to tell Tom and I wondered how many times he had heard the  line “just for a few days”. A little while later Eddie and his dad drove up pulling a short little trailer with an adorable squealing, large hog ready to bust through the sides. “Well we agreed to take this pig, but Eddie was expecting a cute little Babe or Wilbur” his dad confided. We opened the trailer not knowing if he would bolt for the hills, but he walked right into the barn and as they say in those sappy love stories………..right into my heart. Now after a welcoming treat of carrots and cream cheese coffee cake, I think that he loves me, too. If the name Bacon has any literal meaning, he will be staying here until pigs fly and I know just where to hide him if they start planning a luau.

Swining and Dining

We are taking all precautions to insure that Miss Piggy does not get exposed to the flu of any kind. We wash our hands and sterilize the plates before we fix her slop. We tried to get her to have a sip of red wine for the antioxidant properties of “resveratrol and the flavonoids” but she opted for a sandwich with organic peanut butter and grape jelly. We added some vitamins and flaxseeds and she is limiting the number of visitors until further notice….

less chance of a Canine or Feline outbreak here, either.

Pigasso Will Paint For Food

 

freaky martin.com

If only I had this raw talent. I would not want to clean up after these guys, but  with the profits that these piglets will be bringing in, they will have their own studio with maid service….

 

freakymartin.com

 

freaky martin.com

Fast Friends

Who needs a hippo when you have Miss Piggy?  Fast Eddie shares his cucumbers with her and she keeps him company at night.

All The Pretty Pony Tails

While the girls were busy grooming and learning how to french braid the horses manes and tails, Miss Piggy was enjoying a mud facial and taking a nap. She would need her beauty sleep to get ready for the big night ahead. After dinner, she was looking forward to roasting marshmallows and watching movies all night long!!!!! We love summer!!!!!

Some Pig

Miss Piggy does not want to be left out. She will tolerate being brushed and petted if there are carrots involved. The campers are making her a nice soft bed of hay in the barn where she spends half of her busy day.

Animal House

Can’t have one without the other, as far as we are concerned. Before we had a house out here at the Rockin’ P, we had a horse, or two. It was a while before we realized that those same nimble lips that can search your pockets for a carrot could also turn a door knob. Bailey actually rang the door

bell one day. He also tapped on the glass to get our attention, and oops….cracked the glass. Between the goats and the ponies getting into the house, we decided it was time to fence the yard. We still have a back entrance that had not been pony proofed. Our campers had a wake up call this morning when Miss Piggy and a few ponies greeting them through the window.

 

 

Bacon Bits

Pigs are smarter and cleaner than dogs, so the article said. Some are more affectionate than cats and make great house pets. Miss Piggy is an exception to that rule. Our pig is not a hugger but she does like to be read to. I  read an article to her  about the benefits to being single and I think all she heard was…blah,blah,blah…when you are single the leftovers are all yours!!!!. That’s when I got her attention. She did fall in love once or twice. The first time she saw a potential mate, she was desperate to get his attention. She first gave herself a mud bath and skipped to the chase by attacking “him”. He had the same physique as her, barrel shaped with tiny legs, although he appeared to be napping which is her second favorite hobby next to slopping. They already  had so much in common. It was better than on-line dating, she didn’t have to rely on an out dated photo retouched and manipulated beyond recognition…..Here he was a few feet in front of her. Not one to ever be called shy she launched herself on top of him, only to have him roll away from her as fast as she could stay mounted. This courtship went on for an hour. She was in the best shape of her life. If I had thought to strap on her pig-o-meter, I know she would have run a 10K during this whirlwind romance. She had no clue that Romeo was not interested. He was shallow and plastic, like so many pigs these days. Her heart break was short lived. We shared a gallon of ice cream and then I told her that she could learn a valuable lesson from this relationship. It’s what’s inside that counts. The good news was that he held the capacity to fulfill her dreams of a life time. He eventually flipped for her and she saw what I was trying to tell her. He was as fake as a mechanical bull, but she learned that when you fall you need to get back on and ride again. She could run and she could ride, this would prove valuable for her next major crush…..

Comfort food rules…..once again

The New Me

Tired of Blog Hogs? Me, too! I had my own blog, but I had so many comments and requests for my beauty tips that I had no time to slop and eat the flowers. Blogging is too stressful, so I will just contribute my pearls of wisdom when I can. It’s always something. A few years back, I had 30 acres of peanuts all to myself. They thought a whole family of feral hogs were involved, but it was just me. It’s lonely being an only pig, so I compensate by eating enough for two. Stay tuned for info on my new beauty forum.

Miss Piggy

 

Please do not confuse me with a Muppet!!